My Son Wants Locs!!! YAYYYYY :-)

A little bit of background: My oldest son is 8 years old. He has known mommy as a weave wearing woman for 95% of his life, just last year I laid the weaves to rest. I realized that my son actually believed that all women with long hair bought it from a store! L Sad, I know. So when I sat one night and took my weave out, he woke up the next morning and asked what happened to my hair. “Where is your hair mommy? Are you gonna wear it like that? I don’t like that! I like the straight hair better.” After that, I convinced myself that I was gonna keep wearing it natural! My child did not understand, like, or see beauty in kinky hair! I was disappointed and upset with myself. So my journey was not just for me, it was for my children as well. I wanted them to understand that there was nothing wrong with being black….esp after hearing him say that he wished he was white like Zack & Cody!!! At 7 years old, whatever was portrayed by media (mainly Nickelodeon and WETA) led him to believe that white was right and black was wrong. I looked at him and explained that this is mommy’s real hair. This is what most black people’s hair looks like when its not permed or bought from the nearest beauty shop. He looked at me with disgust and it definitely did hurt…. A lot! Natural black hair was not the perception of beauty that neither tv, society, nor his own mother gave him.
Now, almost a year later….my son looks at me and says, “Mommy I don’t want my hair cut anymore. I want locs like you and my daddy!” I melted inside! Not only does my little prince think my hair is beautiful, but he wants to have his the same way! Kids are a product of what they are taught through seeing and listening. If they constantly see weaves/permed hair and hear us demean our hair, this is what they will believe.
His dad has had loc’s for a few years now but it wasn’t official until mommy joined the team! :-)(had to brag a little) LOL
But here mommy goes again demeaning my babies natural hair as it grows...its still short, his last haircut was about 3 weeks ago, and his hair is extremely kinky and thick! Every time I brush it, it just curls right back up and looks very unkept by the time he gets home. He’s an 8 year old boy, rolling around on the carpet, doing flips and playing in the grass does not sit well with his current phase of hair. I am really fighting the urge to rush him to the barbershop! I love that my baby wants locs and now I have to again, retrain my mind that boys do not need a tight shape up and close-cut in order to look well-groomed. I do love men with locs, I think they are gorgeous. I guess I never thought about what it looked like in the beginning, when they stopped getting haircuts. Can I use the same products in his hair as I do mine?? Has anyone gone through this process??

1 comment:

  1. this is such a beautiful story!! I am not a mommy but like you, I think that teaching about loving our hair starts home and when we are kids. I have never seen my mom's natural hair and all I heard growing up was how bad my hair is.

    Maybe your son could do freeform locs and I think the products you use can also be used on his hair. Most blogs I read on locs/maintenance recommend Dr. Bronner's castile soap and olive oil for moisture. I am a PJ so I have more ;)
    I can't wait to see pictures of his babies locs

    off topic: I also watch Zach and Cody..lol


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