I AM NOT MY HAIR……..??

I used to believe that, I convinced myself that it didn’t matter how I wore my hair did not define me or anyone else. And I guess there is some degree of truth to that for most folks. Its more like, don’t judge me solely based on the texture, tone, or style of my hair. But the style of my hair does bring greater definition to how I perceive myself, a certain level of confidence and self-worth that I did not have before. If you think about it, most people have a connection to their hair or is defined by their style of hair. For instance, you probably won’t find many, if any, ministers/preachers/pastors with a hot pink Mohawk! When people get their hair styled nicely or to their liking, they walk around with a certain confidence. Your hairstyle may change depending on the time of day, event/occasion, mood, or season. Wearing my hair in locs has definitely shown me how connected I am to these follicles. There were times when I wanted to just go to the nearest beauty shop and get a bag of weave, needle, thread and hook-it up! There were other times that I cried in the mirror saying, this is me…This IS Me! It is a test of commitment, strength and courage for me. I always wondered if I could be as confident with my hair natural as I was with a full-head of weave!
When I finally set my hair free, it felt a little strange and naked at first. I loved my teeny weeny afro my twisted mohawk, corn-rows, two-strand twist and all the various styles I was able to create in my hair. I finally began to see the beauty of my hair. Learning what to do and what not to do, how to prevent damage, what products to use and what not to use…it was like retraining my whole hair perception. I would walk the street and see all the beautiful black people of color wearing their hair and some made me smile, others confused me but all gave me joy and inspiration. Then it was time for the true test….to loc or not to loc???
So I rocked some 2-strand twists for a while, just to see if this was something that I would really want to permanently have in my hair. Then I did my first set of locs…which were horrible, my hair wouldn’t loc for crap, I even tried the horrible beeswax! Then I did a second set, back-combed…they were a beauty but after a week or so they were a lot bigger than what I wanted and I just couldn’t do the whole “don’t wash ur hair” thing. Lastly, I grabbed a latch-hook and went to town. I love the fact that I don’t have to use a ton of products in my hair and I can wash/condition it pretty often. The only downfall is that some of them are skinnier than I wanted but I see them plumping up a little so we shall see……….